Recently, I had the pleasure of attending a Mother’s Day Brunch at the church of my dear friend, Michele. The speaker at the brunch gave a very eloquent speech about how her childhood was colored by nicknames that she was called as a child. The next few days held several conversations with a variety of different people regarding the power of words. This set me on this metaphorical path to seeking some of the most powerful phrases that I have either spoken or have heard.
• I believe you – There are so many instances where these three words can give someone validation which, in turn, can open someone up to healing. For me, finding a doctor that believed my symptoms were real and debilitating, helped me to realize that there is hope. Chiari, the chronic neurological condition, from which I suffer is not curable; but I understand now that I have the power to choose which symptoms I will treat. Healing any ailment can only begin after it has first been validated; sometimes we need to hear it from an outside source before we can give ourselves permission to seek help.
• You are not alone – No matter what situation you are currently facing, there will always be someone else who has faced a similar situation. My life, like every other life, is full of triumphs and heartbreaks. Everyone has experienced that feeling of being helpless, hopeless and alone. As long as there are humans on this Earth there will be feelings of despair. Finding the courage to seek solace can remind you that resilience is born of necessity and courage can always be found in the bleakest of circumstances.
• Growth is never easy – Learning the realities of life is difficult. Unjust things happen to good people, justice is never swift, life is unfair, prejudices exist and love can be very painful. We sometimes outgrow our friendships. We realize that our parents weren’t always right. Being an adult is more challenging than we believed it would be. Success doesn’t always come with hard work; it comes only with persistence. The lessons that are the most painful tend to be the most beneficial.
• You are special – You are! Every child of God is special. Everyone has specific talents, gifts and blessings that should be shared with the world. We should remember that just because we cannot see others’ gifts doesn’t mean they don’t exist. We should all work harder to cultivate those talents in each other rather than focusing on the faults.
• I understand – Sometimes having a friend or a loved one to talk to when things are difficult can help us cope with difficult situations. Life is constantly changing. Those that truly love you will be the ones that understand and stick by you when life gives you difficulties that can seem overwhelming.
We can get through this – Like I said before sometimes really bad things happen to good people. When these devastating events happen, they can cause us to question our limitations, our faith, our sanity and our abilities. A friend or loved one can be our strength through the darkest parts and can remind us that the light will once again shine upon us. Often, we just need time to adjust to the new circumstances before we can visual our lives within those new circumstances.
Thank you – Being appreciative of those that help us can inspire them. No, we shouldn’t do good deeds for the thanks; but, we should remember that we can never truly give from the heart until we are able to receive from a place of gratitude. Asking for help takes courage and faith. For many, giving is way of paying back the gifts received during times of need. Never forget to express your thanks and gratitude.
Often we choose our words wisely around youngsters but we often forget that words can hurt people of any age. I also believe that sometimes people choose to make themselves feel better by pointing out the inferiority of others. So when I find myself on the receiving end of harsh words, I allow myself the opportunity to feel the pain. I wear all of the emotions associated with such negativity if only for a moment. Eventually, I come to realize that their negativity cannot alter the beauty that is my life. Their misunderstanding of the world I live in cannot change my eternal truth. I wish I had the ability to show them the peace that I have found for I know who I am at my very core, I know the depths of my faith, I know the breadths of my love. I will let those things speak for me; after all, there is power in words.