Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Why I Blog About Makeup

Welcome to my unknown little blog about makeup and chronic illness. I recently read a post entitled "How Blogging has Changed My Life" written by Laurie from The Makeup Squid. I hope Laurie won't mind that I am piggybacking off of her post; the truth is that she inspired me to write this post. Her post, of course, caused to me start thinking about why I started blogging over 4 years ago.  My blogging has gone through numerous changes and may still go through some. Initially I began blogging as a way of coping with some of the difficulties of living with a chronic illness. For a while it became a crusade, championing awareness of my chronic condition. Eventually it became a newsletter to inform our loved ones far away what was happening with Boyet's journey to America. For about six months now it's been about beauty products. For a while, I considered splitting my blog into two separate blogs one for beauty, the other for my condition and personal things. However, it just doesn't feel right to segment my life. Truthfully because my illness touches everything I do in life. Therefore, I could never be wholly honest if I wasn't addressing that in my blog. 

 This Is What I Love. 
This Is My Life.
 This is Me.

Very long story made short. I was a travel agent for 16 years working with the government and military to book their vacations, as well as, to book their official business. I have escorted groups on cruises, been to Disney World, Disneyland and taken a Disney Cruise for training.


I traveled frequently and cheaply. During my career, I have sent government officials to training all over the world, helped deport illegal aliens, sent small pieces of critical classified equipment to remote destinations and have sent personnel to shut down military and government offices. I have sent young men to basic training to transform themselves into Marines. I have helped young soldiers and airmen get home for Christmas or the births of their children. I have sent troops to war, been questioned about possible terrorists, and I have helped book the remains of a fallen soldiers so that they may come home and rest near their families. Just by reading these sentences I think it's clear to see that this was more than just a job. This was part of who I was.

After my diagnosis and neurosurgery, I was struggling and my health was flailing. The stress and demand of my job were not conducive to living a healthy life. I was forced to give up my beloved career. For years I stayed home and focused on my recovery. I learned to slow the pace of my life and to love myself as much as I could. I learned breathing techniques, yoga, meditation, relaxation techniques, how to focus, how to write and had not a clue as to who I was or who I was supposed to be. Nothing felt right. 

I felt like nobody. 
I was no one. 
I was empty. 

At this point in my life, I owned 1 ill matched foundation, 1 powder, 1 mascara, 2 eye shadows and 2 lipsticks. Makeup was not on my radar. Why would a nobody need to look pretty? One day a friend of mine took me to the MAC counter as she needed to purchase something. I was mesmerized by all of the colors of eye shadow and of lipstick. Chase, my darling MAC consultant, suggested we schedule makeovers within the next few weeks. We came back for our makeovers and I fell in love with everything he delicately applied to my face. It all seemed so magical and I felt transformed into someone whole, into someone beautiful. 

I learned how to trick myself into feeling better by putting on a great shade of eye shadow or a creamy lipstick. Cosmetics and beauty products became a way for me to feel better about myself. If I looked good, I felt good. It's as simple as that. It's tough when you wake up and have to choose between having enough energy to take a shower or to cook something for breakfast. I have been known to brush my teeth, comb my hair, put on mascara and lipstick before I eat breakfast. Having to choose between a few beautiful shades of lipstick always ends with a winning choice. I spent several years watching YouTube beauty channels and reading beauty blogs but I was hesitant to start writing posts about beauty. I didn't feel qualified to write a beauty blog. After all, I didn't have any professional knowledge about beauty products. I am just a sick girl who enjoys wearing lipstick. 

Fast forward a few years, I've met the love of my life and managed to go back to work part time. I had also become a BzzAgent, a company where I get to test products free of charge in exchange for my honest opinion. My first campaign was for Garnier Olia, an at home hair color. I wrote a review, I Tweeted, I Facebooked and did the things I was doing on a daily basis anyway. Afterward, I began incorporating a few beauty posts in my blogs and I began to notice that they had more hits than any other of my pages. I discovered that I really enjoyed writing about beauty products. I found it interesting and challenging. 

I wrote what I wanted.
I wrote what I felt.
I felt free.

There is a sisterhood of beauty bloggers that exists simply because we love sharing beauty with others. This is a community of beautiful women who all write wonderful beauty blogs. I love reading their blogs and learning about their experiences with products. I sincerely hope they enjoy reading mine; but more than anything I enjoy the fact that I have found my own voice and I am using it for something I truly love. I could spend all day thanking an entire list of people for inspiring me. I ask of all of you reading this to know that you give me strength daily to continue this crazy dream of writing a beauty blog. Maybe someday I'll be able to face my fear of being in front of the camera in order to make videos; but, for today I will happily write this blog.

Please feel free to also follow me on  FacebookTwitter, and Instagram. I hope that you can find something that inspires you as much as blogging inspires me. I would love to hear your comments and suggestions below.